


If You Must Die

by Ellienerd14



Category: Class (TV 2016), Doctor Who & Related Fandoms
Genre: Angst and Feels, M/M, Other, yep that sums it up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-28
Updated: 2018-12-28
Packaged: 2019-09-29 11:29:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,789
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17202647
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ellienerd14/pseuds/Ellienerd14
Summary: With higher stakes than ever, there is an impossible choice to made that will affect the future of Coal Hill forever.





	If You Must Die

**Author's Note:**

> I was clearing out my google docs and found this little fic that I never posted? It was meant to part of something much longer as part of take on what would happen if the series continued, which was apparently the angsty ending imaginable? Hmm, how surprising.  
> (also why there is a big time skip in this...)  
> (In this au April and Ram have been send back by the angels already. Like I said, part of a series I never got to finish.)
> 
> BTW for reference of how long its been in my docs - the past 11 months - sigh

**_If you must leave,_ **

**_Leave as though fire burns under your feet_ **

**_If you must speak,_ **

**_Speak every word as though it were unique_ **

**_If you must die, sweetheart_ **

**_Die knowing your life was my life's best part_ **

**_If you must die,_ **

**_Remember your life_ **

_**[(you, Keaton Henson)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZxQLNxFA1Mg) ** _

 

* * *

 

 

"There's a way to close the rift," the Doctor said. He looked guilty at whatever he had to say next. Matteusz eyed him anxiously. "To stop anything else coming out."  
  
"Which is?" Tanya asked. She shared the same suspicious expression as Matteusz and Quill. Charlie, on the other hand, was sat up straight, looking more attentive than ever.  
  
"There was a rift, similar to the Coal Hill one, on the wall of a young girl I knew once. It was crack caused as a byproduct of my TARDIS exploding. The crack was in the universe and it connected everywhere we went. It was caused by the whole universe exploding and time fading."  
  
"Why don't we remember the universe exploding then?"  
  
"I undid it. Saved the universe, put it back together again. But that explosion was a source of the Coal Hill rift."  
  
"Fantastic," Quill quipped sarcastically.  
  
"The Shadow Kin reopened part of the rift. But I was wrong. I thought it first opened when the Shadow Kin came through at prom. But it was open before then. When I dropped Charlie and Andra'ath here the first time, the power from the TARDIS and the interference from the Governor's caused the rift to open. And the timing was bad because on the other side was Weeping Angels I had tricked into falling into the original rift."  
  
"So, that's how the angels got here, on Earth and under the control of the Governors?" Tanya asked. "Through your ship?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"That doesn't explain how to close the rift," Matteusz said wearily.  
  
"I'm getting to that. The rift was opened through the presence of my TARDIS weakening the time energy. The only way to fix it is to go back and close the rift when it first opens... it would heal the time."  
  
"But?" Tanya pressed. "Come on, tell us. You look guilty. It can't be any worse than what's already happened. I'm an orphan, Ram and April are gone, Charlie's been borderline suicidal for months."  
  
"It would undo all activity and inference the rift had done."  
  
"Like a big reset button?" Tanya said. He nodded. "Meaning what exactly? No one would die? They'd be saved."  
  
"Endings like that don't actually happen," Quill said. "Oh, don't look at me like that Andrzejewski, I'm being realistic. Put the big sad eyes away."  
  
"It's not fair to be so cruel."  
  
"It's also not fair that my planet was destroyed."  
  
He didn't have a reply for that.  
  
"No, she's right. It would undo all activity. You'd be taken back to when the rift first opened but time would be rewritten. No Shadow Kin."  
  
"It would undo me using the Cabinet of Souls?" Asked an otherwise silent Charlie. "And I wouldn't remember it?"  
  
"We already know about dangers of you trying to forget," Matteusz said. "Remember?"  
  
"But it wouldn't have happened."  
  
"This is too perfect. What's the cost of a time reset?" Quill asked. "Go on, tell us who has to die."  
  
The Doctor's expression gave everything away. It was eerily similar to one of Charlie whenever he spoke of the Cabinet of Souls.  
  
"The only way to reset is for one of you to enter through the rift the next time it opens. You would have collected enough time energy that the rift would seal itself off and the time stream of events caused by the rift would never have happened," he explained.  
  
"The rift would close all at once?" Charlie said. "Undoing everything?"  
  
"Exactly."  
  
"Do not volunteer for this," Matteusz begged. "Charlie you have done enough."  
  
"I am not going through that," Quill declared. "I have a baby and I don't trust any humans to raise Kit."  
  
"But what happen to whoever of us goes through the rift?" Tanya asked. "Are we reset too?"  
  
"When the timestream of the rift collapses, it would delete whoever was in it. You would be removed from time itself."  
  
"Never to exist?" Tanya asked, followed by far too many swear words that a fifteen year old should know. "And it's the only way?"  
  
"The only way," the Doctor confirmed. "I'm sorry."  
  
"And it, umm, has to be one of us."  
  
"Yes. The time stream from the rift can only be closed by an active member of the rift. You are the most active, so the chances of success are higher."  
  
"One of us," Tanya echoed. She looked over at Matteusz who was sat next to her, anxiously looking at Charlie. She knew exactly what he was thinking. _Not him._ _  
_  
None of them spoke out loud.

 

* * *

 

 

**Weeks later...**

"Can you move?" Tanya asked desperately. Charlie was thinking the same thing.  
  
Matteusz shook his head as he tried to pull himself away from the Weeping Angel that held him in place. The statue was gripping his arms behind him with a vice like grip. There was no escape possible without detaching his arms from his body and given that all was left was two crying teenagers and Quill holding her gun in her mouth and her baby in her arms, it wouldn't have been possible to get him out.  
  
"Don't blink," he said. "I think it will kill me if you do."  
  
"We can't win this," Charlie said. "There's no way. There are hundreds of the angels and we can't get out and find help."  
  
"Be a little optimistic. If I'm going to die..."  
  
"Shut up," Charlie interrupted. "Don't make me hear you say that. Ever. I want a nice memory to hold onto."  
  
"Charlie, you're not helping," Tanya hissed. "You know that right?"  
  
"It's okay." He wiped his eyes. "You're smart Tanya, you know how to save him. How to end all this."  
  
She started to shake her head slowly and then froze. "Don't be an idiot."  
  
"Tanya? Charlie?"  
  
They both looked over to Matteusz who was still struggling in the grip of the Weeping Angel. Quill was staring at it, the only safeguard left. Charlie couldn't help feeling like he had failed. He had swore to protect Matteusz. The most important part of his universe.  
  
"Does it hurt?" Charlie walked over, evidently worried.  
  
He nodded in response. "It's strong but it is a statue."  
  
"I hope you can forgive me what I'm going to do. For what I was always going to do."  
  
"You aren't making sense Charlie."  
  
He kept his eyes glued to Matteusz' grey ones. "The rift is open."  
  
"No! No, no, no, no! You can not."  
  
"We both knew I would. It will be for the best." Charlie checked that Quill was watching the Weeping Angel and turned to Tanya. "You'll have your Mum back. And Ram and April."  
  
"Would it be bad if I thanked you?" Tanya asked. "It feels bad. Everything feels bad. I think that I'm crying."  
  
"You are."  
  
She wiped her eyes hastily. "I hate that it ever came to this."  
  
"Me too. I looked forward to seeing you every day. All of them. Thank you for being my friend."  
  
"Thank you for being mine."  
  
Charlie kissed the top of her head and took off his coat. He put it around her shaking shoulders and smiled. Tanya focused on looking at the Weeping Angel and avoiding Matteusz' eyes. He wasn't pleading anymore, he just stood there in silent acceptance of what was to happen. It was probably worst.  
  
"I'm sorry you had to be my slave."  
  
"Don't get all sentimental with me Prince," Quill spat out in response. She sighed. "I haven't forgiven you for it."  
  
"I would expect nothing less from you." Charlie stroked Kit's chubby cheek with one finger. "I asked the Doctor and he said time will heal around me... or where I should be. You'll still survive the massacre and Kit will live."  
  
"He finally did something good."  
  
Quill didn't smile at him but she saluted, not the typical human kind but a strange gesture involving putting her hand on her stomach. She showed respect, not for everything he had done (they could never be friends) but for his final act.  
  
"And you."  
  
"There's so much to say but tell me you're struggling too."  
  
"I don't regret knowing you. I don't regret anything. I just wanted to keep you safe." Charlie wiped away Matteusz' tears and touched his cheek. "I love you."  
  
"I love you too. And I'll lose you."  
  
"Goodbye." It was a single word but Charlie hoped it would be enough. Humans liked closure, he had learnt. And so did he.  
  
Charlie waited until he had left the room to wipe his own eyes. He had left too much unsaid. He would always leave so much unsaid.  
  
It wasn't like he would regret it for long. There was two more goodbyes he couldn't say. April, who was always so much braver than him and Ram, who had died protecting her. He hoped that the Doctor was right and that he could bring them back somehow.  
  
Charlie took the sonic screwdriver the Doctor had given him and use it to open the rift.  
  
The rift was opened, large enough for him to step inside. He looked into the corridor of the school one last time before stepping in.  


* * *

  
  
It was bright around him. Charlie was stood nowhere but somehow still moving, drifting through the rift. Snapshots flickered by of semi-familiar things but in the wrong place. A flower grown in a lab, drifting towards him and out in another tear. Black jagged swords swishing from the Shadow realm. Charlie thought he got a glimpse of Ram, diving in. A long silver leaf dragon, scampering after its lost mate. The rift was getting smaller and tighter, closing around him.  
  
He closed his eyes and prayed it would just end.  
  
He hit the ground with a bump. Charlie opened an eye and found himself not lost but on the outskirts of the school grounds. It must be where and when the rift had first opened.  
  
"Are you okay?" A familiar voice asked. Matteusz didn't seem to recognise Charlie at all, which meant he must have gone back before they met. "You're lying on the pavement and I doubt it's very comfortable."  
  
"I'm fine."  
  
"You're crying. Does it hurt?" He had unknowingly repeated Charlie's words back to him earlier.  
  
"I'm fine really." He glanced at the school gates and caught a look of a teenage boy laughing with his friends. Charlie recognised him from the missing posters as Kevin Williams."Do you know the date? I lost my phone."  
  
"September tenth." He had arrived on Earth the day before. At least he once he had, in a different lifetime. "Are you sure you're okay? You look very shaken."  
  
"Really I'm fine," Charlie reassured him. "You're a nice person."  
  
"I try to be," Matteusz replied. He smiled but not the kind Charlie was used to seeing. He was looking at him as if he was a stranger. It was horrible. "I should probably head in. Do you go to Coal Hill?"  
  
"Not in this lifetime."  
  
"Well, be careful."  
  
"Hey," Charlie called out to him, against his better judgement. "Keep being nice. I have a feeling the world's a better place with you in it."  
  
He smiled and waved as he turned into the gates. Charlie wasn't sure but he thought he might have been blushing. In every lifetime... he thought before dismissing the thought. It didn't matter if Matteusz had smiled at him because he was going to die. Or be undo and never have existed. He was a ghost.  
  
Charlie turned around at a noise that had become a symbol of hope in the last few months. The TARDIS. Of course the Doctor was there, they would find a way to save him again.  
  
The Doctor was leaning against the TARDIS and caught his eye. Out of instinct - or some blurred, stupid hopefulness - Charlie followed him in.  
  
"How long has it been for you since our talk?"  
  
"One day," he replied. The Doctor didn't smile, Charlie wish that he would. Smiles meant hope, meant an answer. "And you?"  
  
"Weeks. Did it work?"  
  
"I've checked the whole school." He pulled a screen over and pointed at a confusing map on the screen. "The energy spikes are gone and there's no sign of the Governors or the Weeping Angels."  
  
"My friends, are they alive?" Charlie asked. "Did I save them?"  
  
"I've done my research." He pressed a few buttons on her console and the screen brought up an images. The first was of April in a black and red graduation gown. Her hair was longer and had long streaks of blue in it. "April MacLean, 2021, taken on the day of her graduation."  
  
Charlie wiped his eyes. "She won't remember me, will she?"  
  
"That was the cost of saving them all." The Doctor looked guilty still. "I'm sorry Charlie but you don't have much time left."  
  
"I don't want to go. It doesn't feel like I'm fading away." He touched his face. It felt solid as ever and slightly wet.  
  
"You won't be able to hold on to your memories for very long. I think they might already be fading. You are holding on by your emotional ties but it can't last for long. You can't survive off the strength of heartbreak alone."  
  
"I can remember my friends."  
  
"Your memories from your time on Earth are preserved for now by the rift closing around you. Where are you from?" She asked.  
  
"I... I can't remember. Why can't I remember?"  
  
She looked at him with something he couldn't place. "Do you still have the screwdriver I gave you?" He asked.  
  
"Why can't I remember where I'm from?" Charlie repeated. "Am I going to die?"  
  
He always knew it was coming. Charlie had always been afraid of dying. He could remember the Cabinet of Souls, not that it would help him now. He was losing his soul, Charlie could feel it.  
  
"Do you have the screwdriver?" He repeated.  
  
Charlie passed it to him. "Will you remember me?" He asked. "Will anyone?"  
  
"What you did Charlie, was brave and a hard choice to make. You did it out of loyalty and love. You will not be forgotten."  
  
"Only by the people I love." Charlie looked down. "They'll never know what I did for them."  
  
"You'd be surprised what humans managed to hold onto. They have so many stories. You might become one of them."  
  
"Check up on them for me. Protect them."  
  
The Doctor dropped his coat onto the floor and rolling up his sleeves. "I plan to Charlie. You can trust me."  
  
But he got no reply and turned to see a single golden light where Charlie was once stood. The Doctor reached into his hoodie pocket and aimed the screwdriver at the final Rhodian soul. It disappeared and left the Time Lord with the empty space.  
  
"Charlie Smith, you will be remembered. And more importantly, you will saved."  
  
The Doctor pulled a lever and set her destination on the console. No one at Coal Hill batted an eye as it vanished from the side of the road. They had seen worst.  


 

* * *

  
  
"Hello sweetie," a comforting female voice said. "I didn't think we were getting anyone new. My husbands interference, I suspect."  
  
"I thought it was empty," Charlie muttered to himself. "I thought I had used you all."  
  
"It must be a messier upload then we were," a second voice said. It was Americain.  
  
"Where am I?" Charlie asked. "Is the Cabinet of Souls?"  
  
"A Rhodian," the first woman said. "That's interesting."  
  
"Welcome to the library. You have been saved."  
  
"How have I been saved? I died... I was erased from history."  
  
"A big noble sacrifice I suspect. He doesn't like those. Who did you die for?"  
  
Charlie opened his eyes and frowned. He wasn't in the Cabinet of Souls, the world around him looked like Earth. The Cabinet of Souls was meant to look like a paradise. So, where was he?  
  
"People I love. It doesn't matter, I was forgotten."  
  
"River Song." The woman with blond curls framing her face helped him up. "And let me tell you, sacrifices are never forgotten."  
  
"But where am I?"  
  
"The library. The Doctor saved you to the data core. And what's your name?"  
  
That was a good question. He could remember his name on Rhodia and his title of Prince. But one name and one life stood out. Full of people he loved and friendship and happiness. That was the life he had died protecting.  
  
"I'm Charlie Smith."

**Author's Note:**

> So... do you hate me?  
> Let me know what you thought! Idk what would happen next in this au but I could add to it if you want?


End file.
